Okay, perhaps I should explain. A few months ago, a bridge collapsed (remember the 35W bridge in Minneapolis? Yep, that was it) - it was only a few blocks away from my school, and that's what everyone used to get home during rush hour. Unfortunately, once the bridge collapsed, that route was wiped out - and it's not as if you can rebuild a bridge of that size in a few days. So traffic was rerouted to the street right beside my school.
Now, my daily route to school uses that street - however, right when I get to the school, I have to perform a left turn to get to my parking ramp that's RIGHT THERE. Which means that every time I drive to school, I face BAZILLIONS of cars coming the opposite way. Normally, this would not faze me. After all, my stop light has a left turn light. Well, it did. Until the bridge collapsed. Then whoever controls traffic lights decided that, "Hey! Let's turn the left turning light off! I mean, no one ever uses it! We just put it there years ago because we felt like it! Whoo-hoo!" (note my sarcasm). So now I have BAZILLIONS of cars cutting me off from making that VERY IMPORTANT turn. And I wait. And wait. And wait. And wait. Every single day, I wait at least 3 stop light cycles, if not more, in the morning when I get to school. Then when I leave for dinner and come back around 5, I wait ANOTHER 3 stop light cycles. And let me tell you - having to do this EVERY SINGLE DAY for months has slowly been driving me B-A-N-A-N-A-S. There's a left turning light RIGHT THERE, installed, ready for use, but NO ONE TURNS IT ON. So finally I snapped last week and sent in a complaint to the city telling them that it is IMPOSSIBLE to make a left turn during rush hour traffic, and it is MOST frustrating.
They sent an email back saying that their investigation would take 5 days.
I thought, "Cool", and then went and played with my pugs.
Today I'm driving to school, and see car lights shining like little firefly butts waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyy into the distance. Oh, crap, not again. So I get to my stop light, and get ready to wait a good 10 minutes before I can turn. Then, to my utter shock, I see a little green arrow pointing to the left. An arrow, people! AN ARROW! My turning light! It's there! So before the mirage disappears, I turned and parked in my ramp.
Then I got out, screamed, "I WIN, RUSH HOUR TRAFFIC!!!!! KISS MY ASS, SUCKERS!!!" and start into Barry Manilow's "It's A Miracle".... "a true blue spectacle, a miracle come true". Well, maybe I didn't say it out loud, but my MIND was screaming it. And that's all that matters.
....or Get Off the Pot
2 weeks ago